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Joke of the Day
"*bird forgets to set alarm clock* *worm has pretty laid back morning*"
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"Shadow dancers begin making a mock hanging motion to Katy Perry's singing"
"When the Chinese fill out government forms... Under ""Occupation"" do they write ""Tibet""?"
"My girlfriend is a stoner who works at a hotel fixing whatever breaks. She's kind of high maintenance."
"If FedEx and Ups merged would they call it Fed UP?"
"Why do black people only have nightmares? Because we shot the only one who had a dream."
"My grandma started dying in the living room Well, I guess it isn't the living room anymore."
"My girlfriend wanted to use a protractor during sex... but I told her graphing paper is where I draw the line."
"If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in."
"Knock Knock. ""Who's there?"" ""Kenya."" ""Kenya who?"" ""Kenya let me the fuck in?!?"""