101077

Joke of the Day

"Who is the richest painter ever? Monet."

"Shakespeare's The Life and Death of King Richard III Spoiler Alert: Richard III dies in the end."

"Just got back from my secret society meeting. I'm really pleased with next year's Golden Globe winners."

"An Asian kid ask him mom: ""Mom, why do I have to score A in everything?"" Him mom replied: ""Because we are Asian, not a Bsian or Csian, or Failsian."""

"If you lose a tooth as an adult, the tooth fairy gives you a trailer."

"I went to see a gay magician's show last night. For his last trick, he disappeared with a poof..."

"My furnace broke down on me. So I'm having a housewarming party."

"Respond to every ""How was your weekend?"" today by staring off into the distance & whispering ""So much blood..."""

"The jerk store called. *removes hat* I'm afraid there's been an accident."

"already regret the text i'm about to send"