100947

Joke of the Day

"Ever notice how white women over 40 can't dance without clapping?"

"They used to be called ""Jumpolines"" Till your mother had a go."

"I approach sex and parking the same way Get close enough to the end while still being able to safely pull out."

"I'm really good in bed. When you compare it to how fucking awful I am out of it."

"[Morgan Freeman narrating my life] ""He's still sleeping."""

"The thing I don't like about Dietary Fiber is the large poops I'm also not crazy about our dog's name."

"A son walks up to his dad and tells him: ""Dad, did you know in other countries you don't know who your wife is until you get married?"" His dad replies: ""It's like that everywhere son."""

"Her: I like the man-horsey in this film. He's hot. Me: Centaur. H: What? M: Centaur H: Is that his name? M: I want a divorce."

"Girl, are you astrophysics? Because I don't know enough about you to finish this joke."

"What do you get if you jack off Donald Trump? you could say, I vank a Trump"