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Joke of the Day

"Scientists just discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%... it's called 'wedding cake'"

"I won't undo a retweet in case someone finds it offensive. I just knit them onto pillows and give them as Christmas gifts."

"They've been together for 28 years! DEEZ NUTS"

"How do you piss off a historian? Give them a tampon and say what period is this from?"

"Came downstairs to watch the game and the channel had changed. Looked at the dog, he looked back, then slowly slid his paw off the remote."

"Facebook: Hate people you've met. Twitter: Love people you haven't."

"Honey Boo Boo changes name to Sugar Scab."

"It's a shame that Samsung cancelled production of the Note 7... but at least they went out with a bang."

"I hate going to liquor stores. Everyone wines about everything."

"why don't lions like clowns? they taste funny"