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Joke of the Day

"Why are there no Televisions in Afganistan? Because of the taliban"

"[Noah from the Bible is doing laundry and his washer just starts spewing water] DEBORAH GET THE BOAT"

"[Whole Foods] Woman: MY COCONUT WATER BROKE! *I drive her to the hospital and she names her first coconut after me*"

"which is the best key on keyboard?"

"Maybe you owe the rhythm some money and that's why it's trying to get you. WE DON'T KNOW!"

"The Flat Earth Society Has members all around the globe."

"What did the Israelite say to the american when offering him a drink? ""Here, try this, Israeli refreshing!"""

"Chuck Norris' prostate has eaten dozens of doctor's middle fingers."

"I just flew in from Nova Scotia and boy, are my arms tired... From jacking it in first class the whole way."

"I'd never let my kids watch an orchestral performance. Too much sax and violins."