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Joke of the Day

"I met the girl of my dreams, but it turned out she was my cousin... Lesson learned: Don't flirt at family reunions"

Next Joke
 
"I suspect that my cat has plans to kill me, but has just never been awake long enough to carry them out. Advantage: human."
"I've been driving with a coca cola can stuck in snow on the roof of my car for a week cuz 7 thinks it makes us cops. Stare all you want."
"Gf vs Wife Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? A: 45 lbs. Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? A: 45 minutes."
"kanye west slowly pacing around the room to avoid a bee but insisting that he's not scared of it"
"A termite walks into a bar and asks ""Where is the bar tender?"""
"Why is 6 afraid of 7 7 is a registered six offender"
"I like my coffee black Like Jesus"
"Told my wife that the doctor thinks I have irritable vowel syndrome. She said, ""I think you mean 'bowel'."" I said, ""Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyybeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee."""
"How do you make a hamburger smile? Pickle it gently!"