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Joke of the Day

"Oh shit, my computer uses U.S. English. I wanted to 'save' the document but accidentally blew it up."

"What do you call a gay avatar? A bender."

"If at first you don't succeed... ...then sky diving is not for you."

"My bank says my password isn't strong enough. Did it ever stop and think that my password has a lot going on right now?"

"I was addicted to the hokey pokey but then I turned myself around."

"How many times does it take for a woman on period to change a lightbulb? IT WILL TAKE THE TIME IT FUCKING NEEDS !!!"

"How do you hide an elephant in a fridge? You remove his slippers and open the door . You put him inside. You close the door and take the slippers away."

"i don't need a ""previously on..."" ive been watching this show for 9 hours straight"

"Auditions are being held for you to be yourself. Apply within."

"I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control, and I thought to myself. ""Well this changes everything"""