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Joke of the Day

"I'm so poor that for Christmas my mom cut a hole in my pants so I would have something to play with."

"I sleep better naked...why can't the flight attendant understand this?"

"I believe what politicians say about as much as I believe the person who says, ""I never got that text."""

"Saw a black guy with seven fingers today! Turns out he was eating a kitkat....."

"My girlfriend is kind of like a ninja attack.. They're two things I'll never see coming. (I've never been so proud of myself for writing a joke)"

"My brother ran into my room just now and said ""Someone dumped exactly seven used condoms on my bed!"" I said: ""Huh, that's odd."""

"Life is like a box of condoms. If you don't use one, you never know what you're goin get."

"Heroin is like a baby.. ..it feels so amazing to have in your arms."

"I robbed a cookery shop last night... to make it big you've got to take some whisks."

"What is the hardest part of rollerblading? Telling your parents you're gay."