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Joke of the Day

"Having a bit of a lazy day... sitting in my underwear looking for jobs online. My boss doesn't look amused"

"Clapping was invented by white people at concerts, because we have no idea what to do with our hands when we dance."

"What musical instrument can be found in nearly every Bathroom? ... ... A tuba toothpaste."

"I like my coffee like I like my women... Cold and bitter."

"My best friend was brutally murdered last week Its only now that I can look back and laugh. - Norm Macdonald"

"What are the differences and similarities of flint michigan and the walking dead universe? They are both post apocalyptic but only one produces brand new cars."

"[flicks cigarette out window] submarine captain: you fool!"

"Where does dragon milk come from? A cow with short legs."

"How do you call people that are always squinting at you? Asians"

"What's a wavelength's favorite animal? A lamb, duh!"