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Joke of the Day

"I'm a shy person with low self-esteem, but I'll tell you a great joke ..if you promise not to laugh."

"There was an explosion at my favorite restaurant last night. News reports say that someone ordered the ""chicken a la Hu-akbar."""

"WAITER: can i take your order? HER: *looks at lobster tank* i'll take that one ME: *looks out window* i'll take that pigeon"

"The inventor of predictive text has died. His funfair will be hello on Sundial. #1PUN"

"I miss the old days. When a duck face meant that you had a stroke."

"I can tell within seconds of meeting someone if they'd be annoying on a group email."

"Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money i make Then they call me ugly and poor."

"INSTANT KARMA, Get in on the front page gold rush; ""are jokes"" reddit is a faggot... ...2Bcunt in you'ld (you would love it) (to (too) be continued))..."

"I have to make a best man's speech at my brother's wedding next month. I need a few jokes to liven up my speech. Any ideas?"

"You're a guy, therefore you can't ""hehehehe""."