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Joke of the Day

"If you see a swarm of jellyfish, DO NOT enter the ocean. It's a no-brainer."

"When does a cub scout become a boy scout? When he eats his first brownie."

"Where did the suicide bomber go when he died? EVERYWHERE!"

"JESUS: so I'm u GOD: yes JESUS: and ur me GOD: yes JESUS: I don't get it GOD: I do JESUS: how can one of us get it & not the other GOD: whoa"

"[TIL] Subway uses artificial chemicals to keep their bread fluffy! Ooops, wrong sub!"

"Dumb and Nobody in class... Dumb: Teacher!! Teacher!! Nobody is bothering me. Teacher: Kid, are you dumb? Dumb: Yes."

"What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate? A chocolate BAA"

"Wait, so you're saying these booklets are FREE? THESE booklets? Filled with HUNDREDS of real estate listings? OK, WHAT'S YOUR ANGLE?"

"What is the difference between jelly and jam? (NSFW) I can't jelly my cock down your mothers throat..."

"four years ago I asked out the woman of my dreams. Today I asked her to marry me!!! She said no both times."