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Joke of the Day

"Two kids were walking home.... The one kid ask the other, ""Do you believe in the devil?"" The second kid reply's ""Of course not. It's all silly. The devil is like Santa, it's always your Dad."""

"Alright! Everyone that got a DM containing a map to my treehouse, meet there in 15 mins. Those who didn't, maybe consider being nicer to me."

"Once, in 2006, I stayed off the internet for an entire 19 minutes."

"I wish you were on the football team because I'd love to see your backfield in motion."

"""yer a magician, harry"" hagrid said to hary houdini when he graduted magic academy"

"Why did the farmer get nominated for an award? Because he was outstanding in his field. Why didn't the farmer make it to the award ceremony? Because he was out standing in his field."

"I recently got a device that can remotely slow down any car And as an added bonus it shows me what speed they're going at too!"

"What does a man with a 12 inch penis have for breakfast? this morning I had bacon and eggs."

"""Can't argue with that!"" he said, pointing to an inanimate object."

"What is better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Having two legs"