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Joke of the Day

"FEmale The original iron man. (clever feminist joke I read on a T-shirt. Not actually a huge feminist.)"

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"Fat jokes aside, let's not forget fat people have feelings too Hunger"
"Society: Be yourself ........ Society: No not like that"
"Why are politicians assholes so clean? Because all their shit comes out of their mouth!"
"My toddler begged to go swimming and then threw a tantrum because she didn't want to get wet in case you were on the fence about having kids"
"Where do bees go on holiday ? Stingapore !"
"Why is Cam Newton's house so dirty? He doesn't pick up after himself."
"Everyone knows if you see a white guy with dreads you punch them in the face"
"I have invented a machine *that reads the subtext in different voice*"
"A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink... When the neutron gets his drink, he asks, ""Bartender, how much do I owe you?"" The bartender replies, ""For you, neutron, no charge."""