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Joke of the Day
"You are what you eat Asshole"
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"What U.S. State has the smallest sodas? Minisoda"
"I hate it when I gain 10 pounds for a role and then realize I'm not even an actor."
"I don't need a football game to get drunk and scream at my television."
"My friend stopped taking steroids recently... It wasn't working out for him."
"My wife doesn't appreciate that I love her mother in law more than I love mine."
"If a Tesla car gets stolen . . . would it be called an Edison?"
"Women's rights. want to laf again? **WOMYNS RITES!!!** el oh el"
"I tossed my friend Sierra a can of pop Sierra Mist"
"Looking forward to the time when my level of awkwardness becomes socially acceptable."