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Joke of the Day
"Why couldn't Moses believe his mother sent him away in a basket? Because he was in de-nile"
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"[NSFW] Why do hipsters like anal sex? Because it's indie ass!"
"It's weird they report fantasy football during Sports Center. That's like the local news telling us how your SimCity is doing."
"A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar r/Jokes mods ban them for having different beliefs than them"
"[15 minutes into choosing which crab from the tank to have for dinner] Date: are you crying?"
"Eve says to Adam "" this salad is so good"" Adam says to Eve ""That's the basket with my dirty clothes"""
"what do you call a clan of barbarians you cant see? invisigoths"
"My wife sez that I'm too extravagant; that if anything ever happens to her I'll have to beg. I told her I'd be fine. I mean look at all the experience I've got."
"What do you call an army of toddlers? Infant-ry. *insert cringe here*"
"Learned today that it's about 12 min after realizing there's no TP in the stall that you ask yourself how important your socks really are"