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Joke of the Day

"Jeff and Don are singing deck the halls.... When they both suddenly die part way through the song. They are reincarnated as ass-less chaps. Jeff looks over and says: ""Don, we now are gay apparel."""

"Ashley Madison website is having problems. But instead of addressing them directly, it'll just look for a younger hotter website on the side"

"My brother took being sent to prison really badly. He was yelling and screaming, took off his clothes, and would not accept any food from anyone. That was the last time we played monopoly."

"Man says to wife ""what would you do if I won the lottery"" Wife ""take half and leave your ass"" Husband ""good, I won 12 bucks here is 6, now get the hell out."

"Why did the duck leave the dancefloor? He didn't want to get down on it."

"If A Book Store Never Runs Out Of A Certain Book, Dose That Mean That Nobody Reads It, Or Everybody Reads It"

"[meeting a couple at dog park] ""BARK BARK!"" GF: He's usually not like this [pulls me aside] GF: Stop yelling bark bark at those nice people"

"What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza can have meat and cheese."

"Wireless Internet is like Sex You still want it, even if it's unprotected and in a public place."

"I should put my GPA up for adoption. There's no way I can raise it by myself."