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Joke of the Day

"While having dinner, the dad scolded at his son: ""If you continue talking about crap during the meal, I'll slap the shit out of you"""

"Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after Chuck Norris gave them a roundhouse kick to the face."

"The best part about pooping with the bathroom door open in the morning is being able to see everyones face at Starbucks."

"The worst part about by dad driving his hummer through a river was it was not his most expensive mistake. I was. It was me. I was the most expensive mistake."

"You Know The Economy is really Bad when even God starts laying people off #pope"

"I'll never understand why the guy that invented braille didn't just put the dots in shape of the actual letters."

"Hug your children. Hug your friends and family. Hug the cashier at Chipotle. Hug someone else's children. Hug the arresting officer."

"Good jokes are like pizza. This is not a pizza."

"I used to be afraid of flying in planes Until I tried it without one."

"""Kim Jong Il dies at 69."" That's how I'd like to go. With wet balls and a face full of cunt."