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Joke of the Day

"haha remember when you were a kid you'd hide inside the clothes racks at stores. can't do that as an adult. someone's stupid kid is in there"

Next Joke
 
"What are twins favorite fruits? Pears"
"My wife left me *sobs uncontrollably*"
"Well my friend was raped by a troupe of mime artists... They did unspeakable things to her."
"Told my daughter I was into incest... She's taking it pretty hard..."
"Why is a gay man having sex similar to Tony Abbott? They're both fucking arseholes."
"What's E.T. short for? His legs are small."
"""I wish my girlfriend sucked my dick the way she sucked the fun out of everything."" -Shakespeare"
"Why should apiarists determine standards of beauty? Because beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder."
"How do you know when a movie is going to be shitty? There are more than 1 SNL cast members in it"