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Joke of the Day

"I found out the other day my sister was arrested for bestiality Well, just call me a monkey's uncle.... Credit to Stewart Francis"

"You really gotta hand it to short people.. Because they usually can't reach it anyways."

"Professor X can move objects with his mind If Professor X can move objects with his mind, why can't he make his legs move??"

"Whats the difference between a Chickpea and a Garbanzo Bean? I've never had a Garbanzo Bean on my face."

"Did you hear about the power surge across the street? I heard it was a shocking experience."

"What lives in the ocean is grouchy and hates neighbours ? A hermit crab !"

"Just saw two homeless people hitting each other with cardboard.... Pillow fight?"

"Why I'm leaving /r/jokes I have to go to work. I'll be back later."

"See someone you know in a store..... ""WHAT'S UP MAN!!"" Walk around and see them again..... Nod your head & slight wave See them a third time.... Avoid all eye contact."

"Drunk me absolutely loves creating awkward encounters for sober me."