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Joke of the Day

"Two blondes were on an escalator in the mall, when the power went out. They had to wait 3 hours to be rescued."

"Why do women and children evacuate first in an emergency? So the men can go on Reddit and repost this joke."

"What do you call a Tumblr user who identifies as a device which inflates a tire? A pumpkin!"

"I will straight up walk into traffic to avoid a kid selling something."

"How do you feel about euthanasia? I think we can exploit them by increasing our amount of sweatshops."

"How do you flirt with a calligraphist? Say, ""You have pretty I's!"""

"How do you make Helen Keller cry? Turn the stool upside-down"

"What's the smallest instrument in the world? An e-lectron."

"My doctor told me that I have ADHD but when I got home and checked, I still only have basic cable. Lying bastard!"

"I can't turn my head very far in either direction It's a pain in the neck! My mom made that up."