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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a lobster with a boob job and a Greyhound terminal? One's a busty crustacean and the other's a crusty bus station."

"Short Dad Joke These kind of jokes always make me laugh a little, if you don't get it at first.. think about it! ""A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop."""

"Angry kids are like toys. Wind them up and watch them go."

"Did you hear about the guy that lost his left arm and leg in a car crash? He's all right now."

"What's the difference between a lazy overeater and a flirtatious emo? One is Sloth the Gluttonous the other is Goth the Sluttiness. Yep made that up on the way home today... Sorry."

"I think I'd be really good at pulling hay from a horse's mouth But I may just be clutching at straws here."

"the grocery store guy left the eggplant out of the bag because he must have known i was gonna eat it on the drive home"

"Why do Autonomous cars have steering wheels? You have to hold on to something, when the shit hits the fan. ;->"

"--Whenever I am down in the dumps, I buy a new hat. --So that's where you get them."

"While I'm not much of a cook, I know enough to cut sandwiches in triangles to make them taste better."