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Joke of the Day

"Do you know anything about tapes and cd's? Do you think if i taped my dick to my forehead you could cd's nuts?"

"I may have dry humped the Oreo section at the supermarket today, but I'm not telling. Just kidding, I totally did!"

"What kind of beer does Hitler drink? Neinenkugel"

"*holds up 2 ties* which one, I have a big meeting today ""both are nice"" [wife calls later] ""how'd it go"" well, wearing 2 ties was a disaster"

"Leaving a warm bed on a cold morning is my personal hell."

"Walnut: I look exactly like a brain. Broccoli: Hey, I look like a tree. Mushroom: Wow, I look just like an umbrella. Walnut: I look exactly like a brain. Banana: Man, can we change the topic please?"

"What's Hitlers least favorite drink? Jewce"

"Father say to son ""If you keep masturbating you'll go blind."" Son replied ""Dad, I'm over here."""

"Dad joke: What time do monkeys poop? Tree turdy."

"What do you call a Chinese millionare? Ching-Ching."