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Joke of the Day

"Just dropped ranch dressing on my phone then licked it off. So some of you just got to first base with me."

"Are you the enemy of my enemy? Asking for a friend."

"We are all seven Huffington Post slideshows away from finishing a minor task"

"I love to hold my wife's hand when we are out. If I let go, she shops."

"Why are all blond jokes 1 liners... So men can understand them too!"

"TIFU when I deleted my gym membership, hit my lawyer, & posted it to Facebook."

"What do you call a half Jew? Jew-ish."

"Actual Mechanical Advantage(AMA)"

"The first time I took a Viagra it got stuck in my throat I had a stiff neck for 2 days"

"Did you hear about the pirates who became shoe shiners? They were s*washbuckling*!"