95819

Joke of the Day

"I asked a friend of mine what it was like being a herb farmer.... ...He said its not so bad and that he had a lot of thyme on his hands."

"You and I are just different. And by different I mean you're stupid."

"What do you call a Lesbian with fat fingers? Well hung"

"A sheep, a drum, and a snake walk into a bar... Ba-dumm-tsss"

"""You're joking about calling it Good Friday, right? I told you the part about the nails?"" -Jesus"

"If you look up ""cool"" in the dictionary, you'll see a picture of me. I like to deface dictionaries."

"I think if we trained bears to fly planes people wouldn't worry about hijacking because they'd be too worried about bears."

"Did you hear about the kiln operator who sucked at his job? He got fired."

"Why does an Ethiopian baby cry? He's having a midlife crisis."

"If you take meat from a calf... ... it could either be veal or below-knee."