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Joke of the Day
"What's the difference between a paddling pool and a swimming pool? Deep ends really."
Next Joke
"Are you on a date with me or with your phone? Just make sure that phone pays your share of this bill by the end of the night."
"How do Muslim women get wrinkles off their faces? Fabric softener."
"What's the same about Mexican and Black people? Once you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal. (Sorry if you're offended, I love all races.)"
"This is not meant for you. Look away. STOP LOOKING AT IT!"
"I got a German girl's phone number I just ask her for it and she said, ""nine nine nine, nine nine nine nine."""
"*calls wife into the bedroom* *dims the lights* *turns on Marvin Gaye* *sexily sweeps toddler's collection of trucks off the bed*"
"I put suicide notes next to roadkill so their animal families have some closure"
"So last year I dressed up as a bop it for Halloween... I should've known I'd end up in jail"
"What did the Mexican student write his essay about? Life outside of prison."