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Joke of the Day
"I got a bottle of scotch for my wife... ...that's not a bad trade."
Next Joke
"If a cowboy rides into town on Friday and three days later leaves on Friday how does he do it? The horse's name is Friday!"
"11% of my life has been spent watching things load 12%"
"There was a man who entered a local newspaper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did."
"Worst days in United States history.. .. 9/11 and 11/9"
"Has anyone's leg ever become pregnant with puppies?"
"What's Donald Trump's least favorite music band of all time? Foreigner."
"What did the elephant say to the naked man? ""How do you breath through something so small?"""
"It's called Wal-Mart because the Center for Disease Control was taken."
"Money can't buy you happiness. But it can buy you burritos and a Slip N' Slide. So you do the math."