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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the cannibal who commited suicide? He got himself into a real stew."

"The amount of duplicates on this subreddit"

"Studying abroad: Spending months in another country. Studying a broad: Spending months Facebook stalking Ashley."

"I found this place online that sells authentic moon rocks. The rocks themselves are really cheap, but the shipping is a bitch."

"How is marriage like a tornado? At first there is a lot of sucking and blowing, but when it's over your house is gone."

"It was love at first sight. Then I took a second look!"

"I really really hope parallel universe me is vomiting on my cat's carpet right now."

"What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? mmmmmmy ass!!!!!! neeeheeeeeheeeeheee -Evil Betty"

"Do you know what really grinds my gears? Poor clutch control."

"Rubbing my ass on these documents because the boss's email says to ""cheek his paperwork""."