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Joke of the Day

"In my spare time, I help blind kids I mean the verb, not the adjective"

"I was going to view the front page But I had already reddit"

"The best part of being incompetent to cook and feed myself is that when I travel I am positive I didn't leave the oven on."

"Fact: it's impossible to look tough while getting a snack from a vending machine. You're all, ""Wheeee! A tiny bag of Cheetos!"""

"I spend an awful lot of time picking the most desirable potato chips out of the bag for someone who's going to eat them all anyway."

"Why did it take so long for Americans to beat Germany in WW2? They weren't Russian."

"What's a Japanese person's hangover cure? Soba Noodles"

"Speech Joke. Why shouldn't you eye-fuck someone? Because there is a chance you will get visual aids."

"What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you already told her twice."

"How do you know if your friend has an iPhone? They tell you."