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Joke of the Day

"I've been getting bullied... and I've been thinking about suicide. I would simply just drink BULLEACH."

"You know your girlfriend is fat when... When she fits into your wife's cloths."

"Going down on a woman is the best. The way her thighs cover your ears so you can finally get some quiet time..."

"I like my women like I like my coffee... Entirely void of pubic hair."

"Forty minutes before we get to the first sex scene in Fifty Shades Of Grey? They do beat around the bush..."

"I went to the zoo the other day and the only animal there was a dog. It was a Shih tzu."

"Usain Bolt and I have a lot in common I can run for less than 10 seconds and enjoy smoking Degrasse"

"I hate all 1970's female solo artists What a bunch of pre-madonnas"

"*doesnt stand for national anthem as protest against people who don't stand for national anthem*"

"Sometimes I'm playing a dangerous game like Halo & people ask if I get scared but honestly no, your training just takes over"