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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend said she bought the lingerie for me, but then got upset when I put it on... I dont get women."

"Question ? Do old lesbians try to look like Rod Stewart or does Rod Stewart try to look like an old lesbian?"

"What does a Japanese guy name his pet lion? Ryan"

"If the Pottery Barn didn't want me to bring my goat in the store, they shouldn't have called it a barn."

"What do you call a big black rat that steals all your food? A Rat-Coon Hope you guys are light hearted enough to not be offended."

"I always have too much month left at the end of my money."

"Vegetables What did the cucumber say to the cabbage when they got kidnapped by the tomato? Lettuce go"

"[date] Me: *ok don't let her know I'm a bull* Her: ""so what are some red flags for you?"" Me: *sweating* ""haha red flags? Where?"""

"Satellite Radio. (Sirius Tweet)"

"2016 is on such a high kill streak I'm worried for when it's going to unlock nukes"