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Joke of the Day

"There are three bears a black, a brown, and a white one. Which bear dissolves in water? The white bear, because it's polar"

"All I ask is that when I'm murdered, you make my chalk outline four sizes smaller."

"Table for six please? ""Is your party coming soon or?"" [Takes 4 turtles and a rat out from coat] I'm going to need booster seats"

"What do you call fake shit? Shampoo"

"Cop: Do you know how fast you were going? Me: I was trying to keep up with traffic. Cop: There`s no traffic. Me: That`s how far behind I am!"

"What do you call a Knight that cuts beef? Sir Loin."

"[Wheel] _'D L_K_ TO SOL__ TH_ P_ZZL_ I'd like to solve the puzzle, Pat Go ahead I'd like to solve the puzzle Yes, go ahead No, I'd like to.."

"What do you call a zoo with only one dog in it? A shitzoo."

"Cabbage get merried to Onion Friends ask them about wedding nigh . . . . . . . Cabbage told them in sad way ""What wedding night, it tooks whole night to undress each other""."

"If the guy behind me stands any closer I'm going to go in for a hug."