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Joke of the Day

"wrong number every day i get 30 calls as wrong number what should i do ?? im fed up of wrong numberss``"

"I ditched my ex gf. For lying. Lying under my best friend."

"The FBI, CIA, LAPD, and some Rabbits"

"""STOP IT STOP IT. CUT. THIS IS ALL WRONG"" I scream at my cats dressed like vampires. ""This is NOTHING like Twilight!!"""

"Your ex-girlfriend has endorsed you on LinkedIn for ""Ignoring Glaring Personal Issues!"""

"Do I just call you or should we resolve this quickly with 200 text messages?"

"Why didn't Superman rescue Princess Diana? Because he was in a wheelchair."

"Siri, when does the restraining order expire?"

"Daughter: Mom, there's a man outside. Me: Get the net!"

"A British man, a Welsh man, a Scottish man, and a Polish man walk into a pub. A British man, a Welsh man, and a Scottish man walk out of the pub."