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Joke of the Day

"We've replaced Steve's regular coffee with a detailed understanding of the impending heat death of the universe. Let's see if he notices."

"Swedish Fish They aren't sweet, just sweet-ish."

"Not right now green light, I'm taking a selfie."

"I sure do feel a shitload more attractive at Walmart than I do at the gym."

"Why aren't any atheists buying a PS4 Pro? They don't believe in higher power."

"I just read Jules Verne's 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea It sure is a story with a lot of depth."

"I sexually identify with the black guy in a horror movie because this won't last long and we all know it"

"What happens if Donald Trump pulls out of the election? He will be Donald Duck"

"What do you call the queue to Alcatraz? Alkaline"

"A police officer walks into a bar. He shoots it and claims self defense."