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Joke of the Day
"I bought a locket today and put my own picture in it. Guess now I really am.... Independent"
Next Joke
"Where do poor meatballs live? the spaghetto"
"This one needs your full participation! Say it out loud. Say the word ""silk"" 3 times Now, what do cows drink?"
"When I'm texting, I start typing faster when i see you're typing too. Oh, IT'S ON!! #amazingrace"
"Teacher: What comes after 69? Student: Mouthwash. Teacher: Get out."
"Basically anything you buy at the hardware store looks like you're getting ready to take hostages."
"I like my women how I like my coffee, with little or no pubic hair."
"I held an orgy for my sexual dysfunction class last night. Nobody came."
"Boss: you're late Me: traffic Carol: he was in his car taking selfies again Me: goddammit Carol, I will cut you"
"Did you hear about the soldier who survived pepper spray and mustard gas? he's now a seasoned veteran"