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Joke of the Day

"Basically anything you buy at the hardware store looks like you're getting ready to take hostages."

"I just burned my fingers in boiling oil and screamed ""OOH OOH AHH AHH"" like a monkey it was a chip pan,see"

"I hate my new Haircut!! ... But it'll grow on me =D Do you get it?"

"I wear a cape when I'm driving so if I get pulled over the cop will think I'm going somewhere to fight crime."

"ChristianMingle is also a great site if you're just looking to get an incredible side hug."

"Your parents brought you up! Don't bring them down."

"Cats & Movies What did the cat do when he didn't want to watch the movie? He paws-ed it!"

"Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat."

"Whitney Houston is 3 Years sober! Wow! Never thought it would happen"

"Did you hear about the midget psychic who escaped from prison? The headline read ""Small medium at large."""