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Joke of the Day
"It's a good thing Harambe got shot.... Dicks out for dead kids just doesn't sound good"
Next Joke
"You know what really makes my day? The rotation of the earth"
"Is your last name Stilton? *insert cheesy pickup line here...*"
"I saw myself naked in the mirror. And now my hand isn't in the mood."
"What do you call a fish with three eyes? fiiish. (works when spoken :-/)"
"BEANS & ONIONS Q: What do you get when you mix beans and onions? A: Tear gas."
"""I guess we should make them sound like a space shuttle is taking off during an a-bomb explosion."" -person who invented hand dryers"
"Which sport is more lame: frisbee, or curling? Discus"
"Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupt... MOOOOOOOO!! (Kids seem to love this one)"
"Me: If you don't like my rules, maybe you can find a different mom. 4yo: *excitedly* Can we really do that?"