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Joke of the Day

"While I was watching the prison wall, a little midget starting climbing over it and smirked at me And I thought to myself, ""That's a little condescending""."

"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself...& murderous clowns, & ISIS, & one of these two getting elected President after Halloween."

"Facebook Genius, Just changed my Facebook name to No one' so when I see stupid posts I can click like and it will say No one likes this'."

"Why did the elephant turn around in the airport and go home? He forgot to pack his trunk."

"Chuck Norris opened the Ark of the Covenant and kept his eyes open. The Ark melted."

"Where are PCs formed? In the computerus."

"What starts with E, ends with E, and only has one letter in it? An envelope!"

"A crane fell in NYC today today a friend told me. I asked if it was Niles or Frasier"

"it's always sad when you have to take your sick goldfish out to the pasture and shoot it in the head."

"I put a message in an empty wine bottle and threw it in the ocean. It said, ""Please refill and return to sender."" Now I wait."