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Joke of the Day

"Why does Daenerys take so long to get places? She keeps *dragon* her feet."

"The waiter at the Mexican restaurant called me ""Amigo"". Am I in a gang now?"

"Maybe if I tilt my head to the side I can understand english ~dogs"

"What did Magic Johnson give his teammates after winning an NBA title? A HI-V (high five)"

"I need farmer jokes I'm doing a speech at the Christmas party and they are farmers....I want to make fun of them"

"Her: What brings you to speed dating? Me: I just ran out of the fancy shampoo my previous GF bought for me."

"I'm gonna open a store that sells three things; Axe Body Spray, Self-tanning lotion & chloroform & call it The Jersey Store"

"""Who's on first?"" ""David."" ""Cool."" -Abbott and Costello's first draft"

"I've always wanted to know how long ""forever"" was... and by looking at some peoples relationships its around 2 to 4 weeks."

"I was in a cab today and the cab driver said... ""I love my job, I'm my own boss. Nobody tells me what to do."" Then I said, ""Turn left."""