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Joke of the Day

"Do you think Jesus described his hair color as light blonde or summer wheat?"

"How many magazines did the racquetball footwear company make before going out of business? Tennis shoes (Also: can anyone think of a more succinct buildup? It seems kinda unwieldy to me)"

"What did the fisherman say to the sewage management person? Would you pull that crap with a net?"

"don't worry, i'm not like other girls *head slowly rotates 360*"

"I hate going to liquor stores. Everyone wines about everything."

"Why did (do?) cavemen drag their women by the hair? if the dragged them by their feet they'd fill up with mud."

"Hostess: enjoy these complimentary after dinner mints Mints: you have beautiful eyes Me: [blushing] wow they're very complimentary"

"What did cinderella say when she got to the ball? NSFW *gagging noise*"

"women secrets? Scientists have now discovered how women keep their secrets. They do so within groups of 40."

"i don't always add and multiply, just sum times"