92029

Joke of the Day

"When I play rock paper scissors I always pick Rock because Dwayne Johnson shows up and punches my opponent."

"Coworker: My arms are killing me from hoeing in my garden this weekend. Me: Thanks but I'd rather not hear about your sex life."

"I gave love a bad name. I called it Harold."

"(from my 9 year old) What time is the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth hurty (2:30)"

"Artists can often be compared to a parabola After they compose, they decompose."

"Marriage counsellor: What's the problem? Wife: He is so literal. It drives me mad. MC: And how do you feel, Stephen? Me: With my hands."

"What is the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The Wheelchair."

"What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry potter can get out of a chamber"

"Why didn't the fiddler have to pay for anything? Because it was all on the house"

"Two rabbits were 69ing. One says to the other, ""hang on, I've got a hare in my mouth."""