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Joke of the Day

"Why did the Soviets pull their missiles out? Because they feared a premature ejectulation"

"I'm really good in bed. When you compare it to how fucking awful I am out of it."

"How do you know if a wizards gay? It disappears with a poof."

"Doctor Doctor I'm becoming invisible. Yes I can see you're not all there!"

"What's the best part of having Miley Cyrus over for thanksgiving dinner? Unlimited twerky"

"So I went clubbing last night... Those seals didn't stand a chance."

"There are two secrets in life The first is ""Never tell anyone everything you know"""

"How do you get a Mormon to stop drinking all of your alcohol? Invite two of them."

"Breaking news!!! Ne ws"

"How do you call a cross-dressing father of two? Transparent"