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Joke of the Day
"What's the best part of having Miley Cyrus over for thanksgiving dinner? Unlimited twerky"
Next Joke
"Which stretches further, human skin or rubber? Human skin! The Bible tells us Moses tied his ass to a tree and walked forty miles."
"I'm sorry, you'll have to repeat that. I'm not fluent in nonsense."
"The milkman A man comes home to his wife and says 'apparently the milkman has slept with every woman on this street except one', his wife replies 'I bet it's that stuck up cow at number 12'"
"Did you hear about the first time offender who was in to BDSM? He got off with nothing but a slap on the wrist."
"A teacher was fired for not letting kids out at the end of the day unless they gave her fresh coffee. It was grounds for dismissal."
"Where do you find a dog with no arms or legs? Right where ya left him."
"I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die."
"Old folks use to poke me at weddings and say your next so... I started doing it back to them...at funerals. "
"My browser history indicates true mental instability"