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Joke of the Day

"How do you get a Mormon to stop drinking all of your alcohol? Invite two of them."

"RIP George Michael I guess this was his 'Last Christmas'. What? Too soon?"

"I have a split personality No he doesn't"

"Why don't women need drivers licenses Because there is no road from the kitchen to the bedroom"

"I've got two right here for ya Who are the easiest kids to pick on? Orphans. Who are they going to tell, their parents? Jews should feel lucky. They got their grandparents cremated for free!"

"I like my women like I like my movies. Silent and in the 20s."

"So much traffic around the funeral home... I guess it's not a dying business."

"I would tell a chemistry joke.. But all the good ones Argon"

"Relationship status: My neighbour/girlfriend was kidnapped but she's ok now, I was caught."

"What did the pirate say when he turned 80? AYE MATEY!"