91638

Joke of the Day

"Democrats wear wide red ties and green sports jackets during the festive season. Republicans do too all year round."

"A man enters a store and says: ""15 litres of wine please."" ""Did you bring a container for this?"" ""You're speaking to it."""

"What did the Jamaican priest call the guy who was arrested for sealing several tonnes of spices? A cinna-mon"

"Why did the Aggie think the weatherman got the sunny forecast wrong? -The Aggie drove through a car wash"

"Why don't Muslims teach driving and sex ed. on the same day? They don't want to wear the camel out."

"Boss: Lunch meeting, let's go. Me: Do I have to? Boss: Free food and unlimited alcohol. Me: *moonwalks to the car*"

"""Describe yourself in 4 words."" Bad at counting."

"a cowboy dog walks into a town He goes right into the saloon and says,"" I'm looking fer the varmint that shot my pa' ""."

"How does Steve Bannon, Trump's Senior Chief Strategist feel after he gets over a cold? Alt-Right"

"[March 15] Brutus: Going 2 the senate? Caesar: yeah u? Brutus: yep it'll be killer Caesar: how so? Brutus: like cool u know rad senate stuff"