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Joke of the Day

"How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles ^I ^am ^so ^sorry"

"Three guys walked into a bar and stopped"

"What do you call a guy who's rolling around in the grass early in the morning? Dewy"

"Today is the only day out of the year I wouldn't mind if people asked me the date just so I can respond with ""10/4 buddy"""

"History teacher: Which period did Cleopatra come from? Me: The one her mother missed?"

"What do you get when you cross an octopus and a Mexican? I don't know but it can pick the shit out of some lettuce."

"Jesus and his disciples walk into a restaurant. Jesus: A table for 26, please. Headwaiter: But there's only . . . um, 13 of you. Jesus: Yeah, we're all going to sit on the same side."

"What did the Christan principal say when she kicked a student out of school? THE POWER OF CHRIST EXPELS YOU."

"I tried crossbreeding my cows. I was attempting to create a new type of milk that was super sweet. Instead, none of the cows would even produce milk. It was a complete and udder failure."

"How do you call a meerkat? C'meerkat."