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Joke of the Day

"Why would you wrap a hamster in duct tape? So it won't explode when you fuck it."

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"Knock knock anti-joke Knock knock Who's there? Not Adolf Hitler . . ."
"Producer: Would you call your leading lady ugly? Director: Let's just say she'd look better on radio than on TV."
"a guy jacks off with pictures of his girlfriend he realized they were blank"
"I keep a length of dental floss inside my perpetually furrowed brow."
"hello 911? this monkey isnt yelling PARKOUR whilst hes swinging through trees"
"A few weeks ago I wrote happy Eid to the Muslims and autocorrect changed it to Happy IED. It almost blew up in my face."
"What does Monica Lewinsky and Soda Machine have in common?"
"A kid came to my door earlier dressed like a mime, so I pretended to put candy in his basket."
"I only have one hand.... So i shop at secondhand stores."