90745

Joke of the Day

"I've decided never to buy anything off the Internet again, after getting conned last week. I ordered what was supposed to be the world's largest cardboard box, but the one it came in was bigger."

Next Joke
 
"What's the best part about twenty two year old wheels of cheese? There are twenty of them."
"*wife walks in to see the boys have built a chair fort* Wife: PUT THOSE CHAIRS BACK! Me *climbing out of fort* YOU HEARD YOUR MOTHER!"
"How do you get an elephant into a Safeway bag? You take the f out of ""safe"" and the f out of ""way""."
"The baby spit up on my Xbox so I had to get rid of it... I'm gonna miss that baby..."
"Currently I'm dating a anorexic chick. but lately I've been seeing less and less of her."
"Friends are like trees. If you chop them down with an axe they will die."
"Bad enough that literally no one showed up for my Super Bowl party today, but now I can't even find the game on tv to watch."
"What do you call a record of everything that goes in and out of your ass? An ANALog."
"Two people are in a fight. Guy 1: ""Well, your sister blew me, and it only cost two dollars!"" Guy 2: ""So she's only charging a dollar an inch these days?"""