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Joke of the Day
"What's the best part about twenty two year old wheels of cheese? There are twenty of them."
Next Joke
"What did the reverend say before eating his salad? Lettuce Pray."
"It's Saturday.. Turning my give-a-crap-o' meter down... "
"""You hang UP."" ""No, YOU hang UP."" - Movie theater workers arguing about hanging movie poster for Up."
"My wife can suffer in silence louder than anyone I know."
"On the one hand I feel bad that Jeniffer Lawrence privacy was invaded, but on the other hand ...well that hand is busy."
"When your wife says ""It's up to you"", it's not."
"20 blind men walk into a bar *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud*"
"What has more letters than the alphabet? The post office."
"People use to laugh at me when I would say ""I want to be a comedian"" Well nobody is laughing now."