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Joke of the Day

"So I tried to tell a friend of mine an Isis joke... but it was poorly executed"

"How do you say goodbye to two people in Spanish? Adidos!"

"Eating a Clock I tried eating a clock once, I wouldn't do it again. It was very time consuming."

"Him: I'm sorry, can we start over? Me: great idea! You introduce yourself, and this time I'll keep walking."

"What kind of modeling clay does a dog use? Fi-Do!"

"News of Whitney Houston's death traveled with such speed. When I heard I couldn't help but crack up with emotion. She was a real heroin. It's such a blow. She really made a hash of things though."

"Thanks History Channel for letting me know that this scene showing General Custer at the Battle of Little Bighorn is a dramatization."

"Chrosshair Crosshair is what rabbit breeders do."

"Do Russia and Uganda realize if they put all their gay people in jail then jail will become the nicest part of their country?"

"Think of a number. Realize that number will never think of you too. Lay on your bathroom floor and sob."