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Joke of the Day

"A pig's favorite movie: The Monster That Ate New York."

"who was the spiciest man to hit a homer in baseball sammy salsa"

"Mitt Romney Runs for president."

"If you send more than one Facebook invitation to the same thing, I will come & shit right in the middle of whatever it is."

"Me: Ohhh, MARITAL arts workshop...now I really feel stupid in this karate outfit. Wife to therapist: Do you see what I'm dealing with here?"

"I traded my brother for an old Game Boy game I'm still not sure what that old guy wanted him for."

"Why don't we see more midget actors? I guess you can say that they are in short supply these days."

"What was I like in high school? You know that guy who drove a Camaro and banged all the cheerleaders? I'm the reason he passed calculus..."

"My boss decided to give me some more responsibility... From now on, I'm responsible for everything that goes wrong..."

"How many forever alone guys does it take to change a light bulb? One, but he wishes it was two."